I talked to a few of my nurse friends the other day. They always have good stories, if you can keep them from describing diarrhea and vomit and mucous in detail. They're careful not to talk about patients due to that dumb HIPPA crap, but I still get juicy information out of them about what's going on in the medical world these days. I can't believe what they told me. Hospitals are hiring Vice-Presidents for Patient Experience--What?!! It seems that hospitals won't get paid if the patient didn't like how they were treated. They need gourmet food and spa treatment. If they give a low score on the satisfaction survey the hospital could go out of business. Doesn't matter if their life was saved...pain medication wasn't given on time! The scrambled eggs were cold! The nurse didn't smile on the 11th hour of her 12 hour shift! But the patient can breathe, the infection was cured, the bone was put back together, the heart attack was stopped, the bedpan was emptied at 3AM with a gentle hand.
But if they insist, if a VP of Patient Experience is truly needed, I have the perfect candidate.
Now, there's a Vice-President for Patient Experience that I'd give a high rating. In fact, I think I'd need an extended stay.
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